SHOWMANSHIP

Wow, I had no idea people could be so cruel or so informed. Now for my next trick...

I'm old enough that my first shows were in the mid 1980's. Since I lived in a medium-sized midwestern town, that meant that from the ages of eleven to thirteen I saw lots of hair metal. I saw Bon Jovi, Cinderella, Poison, Whitesnake, Kiss (sans makeup), Ratt, and a half dozen other bands whose names I've blocked out.

I've been thinking a lot about those shows in the context of the music I go to see now. Recently, Spoon and Stephen Malkmus played separate gigs at the same club on the same night (Spoon early, SM late). Now, these are two of my favorite artists. Both shows were competently played and boring as shit.

I know Spoon is a way better band than Ratt ever was, so why did I have more fun at the Ratt show when I was in fifth grade? The obvious answer is that I had no taste and was easily impressed in my younger days, while I'm now old and jaded. Maybe so. It may also be that the artists I see now are all about integrity and being earnest. That's very high-minded and I appreciate it in the abstract, but I'm starting to feel like I shouldn't have to listen to awful music to be entertained. I mean, would the Arcade Fire really lose anything if they played in ass-less chaps and had a drummer in a rotating cage? I think not. Musicians... make your pre-show thought, "What would David Lee Roth do?" It'll be better for everyone.