YEAR IN RIFFS

[after Riff Market's 2006 Year in Riffs]

This year I lost all concept of "taste in music." There are different combinations of things that can do this to a person, like going out to see bands every week, and getting all your music for free legally and illegally, and getting paid to play recordings of other peoples' music. Anyways it happened. Like I got in a big fight with a friend of mine (girl) over an acoustic cover of "Toxic" because I thought it was insulting to the original, or it had no point, or something ridiculous like that. What does that even mean, or say about me as a person?

This year I wanted more than anything to trek to the desert and see Daft Punk in a giant pyramid, and then it was trek to my cousin's place in Miami to see Daft Punk in said pyramid. Instead I trekked on a bus to Chicago and saw Justice in a small box. It sufficed and I went crazy and felt like they were my friends. I never be alone again come on.

This year I got more sick of blogs than before, which happens every year and I can't belive it keeps getting worse. I now really want music blogs to die, whatever that may mean. Maybe everyone will stop writing, or everyone will stop reading, or maybe yousendits will become felonies. It just needs to stop. Oh wait but if it stops how will I get that Kitsune release of the Van She remix of Klaxons covering Simian Mobile Disco's remix of Digitalism's b-side to their collab with Justice on a track for a comp featuring Pony Club Teenagers whoever's remix of the MSTRKRFT remix of Boys Noize's cover of that one new band on Modular, or was it Ed Banger?

This year I plan on spending New Year's getting drunk on someone else's tab and then getting paid to try and play other peoples' music in a continuous mix while trashed. I feel like the way I should really be spending it is flying to Eastern Europe and meeting up with Fox N Wolf and going out with them to Russian night clubs. They'd be all, "HEY you blockin my way to the dance floor," and fight with the bouncer, and steal bottles from behind the bar, and wear giant fox/wolf masks with glowing eyes, and rap in their cute accents about getting down and getting off and all that, and hi-jacking the DJ booth and putting on a ghetto tech remix of "Maneater." And I'd be standing there at the bar watching with one hand (left) up in the air and one hand (right) down in my underwear, and it'd all seem like a very appropriate way to close out 2006.